October 29, 2011 by Anne Tenino
I am lame alert: I forgot to provide a link to Marie’s blog, which is where Saturday Snark originated. I hope she can forgive me… mariesexton.net
I have been remiss in my snark. I’ve had a lot going on, what can I say? But today, my peeps, I have come up with a beaut for you…
This is from Whitetail Rock — download the Whitetail Rock pdf here — or other formats from All Romance eBooks.
This is an excerpt I’ve sort of been saving, because I was afraid it was too long and took too much set-up. But screw it, I love it. This is right before Nik and Jurgen’s first kiss. Jurgen is a tall, blond cop who looks like a god, and Nik thinks Jurgen is some Aryan asshole who’s after him just because Nik is “exotic”.
The first line is Nik’s, since I didn’t write in attribution tags, and you might get confused.
“You don’t even know me.”
“I know you well enough.”
“After a combined total of fifteen minutes?”
“You have a forceful personality.”
Nik wasn’t the forceful one, here. He shrugged, even though it took effort to make it nonchalant. “I guess it’s better than having none.” Hint, hint.
Guh. He even had sexy teeth. He leaned in to Nik a little. “Is that supposed to be a compliment?” He pulled one hand out of a pocket and stroked a dry, slightly rough palm up Nik’s bare forearm.
Instant goosebumps. Nik grit his teeth and locked his spine. He may not be able to tell what color Jurgen’s eyes were, but he could see the mockery in them just fine. Jurgen’s hand stroked slowly up and down his skin, sweeping up to his biceps, down to his elbow, then up over Nik’s sleeve to his deltoid. Jurgen found and followed Nik’s clavicle, under his shirt, with his fingertips. He found more naked skin at the nape of Nik’s neck with his fingers, stroking his thumb back and forth across Nik’s jugular.
Oh, he was so good. “So, why me?” Nik sounded short of breath to himself.
“I kept wondering what you taste like.” Jurgen pulled his other hand out of its pocket, gripping Nik’s waist, hooking a pinky into a belt-loop.
Nik, the big, stupid, hormonally-challenged idiot, swayed into him. “What do you think I’ll taste like?” He planted a palm on Jurgen’s chest. For balance.
“Cinnamon.” Jurgen’s lips were right over his, and Nik could see his eyes trained on them. Up this close, with Jurgen all out of focus, Nik thought maybe his eyes were blue. Typical.
“I bet you taste like wiener-schnitzel,” Nik said against Jurgen’s lips.
Tee-hee-hee. Love that.
Oh LOL! You always come up with the best snark, Anne! Downloading right now and hopefully I’ll find time to read this soon. 🙂
Thanks, Beatrice! This is one of my favorite pieces of snark ever, and it’s been a crappy week, so I went for it. Glad you liked it. 🙂
LMAO!! So funny…love Whitetail Rock!
Thank you, Sue!
How many times can I tell you how much I love this story before you consider me a crazy stalker (not just stalker, mind you, but the kind that frightens you, like something out of Single White Female)?
I love this couple so much, singly and together.
However, I think I am afraid to visit your fledgling website. 🙂
Oh, c’mon, mc, it’s not that bad… We won’t permanently harm you. Mwah-hah-hah-hah-hah…
Taylor and Cleon are part of it, too, along with some other people. You need to check it out, but we’ve done almost nothing so far.
Well, the warning was certainly to the point. 🙂
Did you like that? I did. 🙂
Very cool! And um, yeah, all forgiven. LOL. 😀
Thanks for joining in again!
Thanks Marie. 🙂 I’m glad I got back into the swing of things, too. I love Saturday Snark.
Whitetail Rock really does have quite a few scenes or lines that make me laugh each time I read them, so I love this selection for Saturday Snark! Thanks Anne.
Thanks, Sue. 🙂 I’m glad I chose this one. I’ve sort of been saving it.
Excellent snark… hehehe wiener schnitzel hehehehe
I know. Jurgen is so not wiener schnitzel, though. *sigh*